WHO AM I?
This might at first feel like a huge question. A bottomless pit. You might look at that question and say “I have a hard time envisioning my day, let alone my entire life and my identity.” This might not appear to be the easiest path to true happiness.
But hear me out: it’s no where near as difficult as we first make it out to be.
You see, our conscious mind wants to make self-exploration hard. The “brain of our consciousness’ is designed to protect. It’s the part of our awareness that thinks things through (good) but also worries about a whole bunch of stuff (a waste of energy).
So this ego blows the task of self-exploration out of proportion. It clouds thought up with a fog and whispers “Watch out… asking ‘who am I?’ can get you into unfamiliar territory and really mess you up.”
It tricks us into thinking our own inner residence – our mind – is the most frightening haunted house we could ever venture into.
Well-intentioned as it is, this fearful, overprotective parent is just plain wrong.
Why do we need to ask ‘Who am I?” and why did I put this question first in the list of questions that focused people ask? For this reason:“A ship in harbor is safe, but that’s not ships are built for.” – William Shedd
Knowing thyself, you are able to live your life to the fullest. You are equipped to leave behind fear, doubt, and worry and live with passion, joy, and fulfillment.
What’s more, you’re much more empowered and equipped to focus. You’re more prepared to feel true happiness and joy, because happiness is made up of three things – progress, contribution and sharing with others.
And you can’t reach your full potential in those three areas without getting to know who you are and what you’re really all about.
Knowing thyself involves asking questions.
When we break the big question (‘Who am I?’) down into a handful of smaller questions, it becomes easy, safe, manageable… even fun.
And that’s exactly what we’re going to be doing here.
For example, in your quest to know yourself, you’ll ask about:
- what you stand for,
- what excites you,
- what you love,
- what turns your stomach.
You might remember these from the previous post. These are a few of the questions we’ll be exploring throughout the holidays.
So let’s begin…
Let’s start asking questions to answer the overarching umbrella question of Who We Are.
QUESTION 1: What is important to me?
This is a question of values.
The answer to this question is to be found in what we consider important, as measured by our current results as well as what we dream to become, acquire or achieve.
What do you value more than anything else? Of these values, which are most important? Which 6 or 7 values are on the very top of the list?
This is not a question to be taken lighten or answered after only a few seconds of thought. The values discovery process can take a couple hours or more. It’s like pumping iron or completing a challenging yoga session or working hard to build your business. It takes effort at first but the payoff, when don’t right, is enormous.
(BTW, I can help you with this. If you’d like to get clear on your values once and for all, let me know.)
You see, we all value different things in life. Our values are like fingerprints in that there are no two exactly the same. We might find another who has a similar value schema and when we do, we often like that person very much. We call them a “like-minded soul” and we cherish our time together. But even like-minded people have slightly different values or hold them in a slightly different order. We’re unique.
Since we have different values or value hierarchies, our goals and desires will differ too.
More importantly, my goals for you may be radically different than your deepest and most heart-felt goals for yourself.
And most important of all…
You must be clear about your values before you go wildly climbing that ladder to what you THINK are your goals.
That is, what your brain thinks are your goals. Remember that brainy part of your awareness? What’s it job again?
To protect you. Is it going to lead your ship out of harbor and across the Pacific to the beautiful shores of Hawaii or Fiji or Bali? Is the ego going to embrace your magnificent potential.
Or if you ARE able to succeed at getting your goals, you may end up in a place that doesn’t give you true happiness. You may become an unhappy high-achiever, someone who has success without fulfillment (which is, in fact, failure).
So in order to focus… in order to get real… in order to break the hypnotic spells and answer a future question (“What do I want?”), we must first ask “What’s most important to me?”
If you’re already done a values elicitation, feel free to share below. I’d love to see what you’ve discovered so I can help you reach the goals that reflect your top values.
(BTW, the most important thing to me in my life work to help people feel ABLE… to feel like they have “arrived” in life… to “go for it”… to realize and manifest their God-given gorgeousness… to feel true happiness and purpose and gratitude and richness right now, in this moment.
So if you’d like to help me, please
- share this post with your friends, and/or
- comment below.
I promise the “brain” within you that you’ll be safe. You are loved and protected and sharing will only bless you as you bless others. Thank you, dear friend